Shidduchim: How Parents Can Help

By Tzivya Rieter, L.C.S.W.

From the August 26, 2005 issue of The Jewish Press

The most unbearable feeling that many parents experience is being helpless in the face of their childís suffering. Parents dream of raising their children to become happy, healthy and fulfilled adults who then go on to raise their own families. Yet for more and more young men and women today, finding the right person with whom to build their families is not happening so easily. The increasing number of singles in the Jewish community is well-known. The pain, rejection and self-doubt that are experienced by those who have spent years searching for their mates can be unbelievably devastating.

Who suffers more, the children who remain single, or their parents? Why is it that so many singles report that the last person they feel comfortable confiding in is the person who loves them most in the world? Why do so many singles feel so alienated and alone? What is the best way for parents to help?

The following are some suggestions that may help parents of singles during this challenging time:

May you soon merit the day when you can walk your beloved child down to the chuppah, with your head held high and your hands clasped together with newfound strength, understanding and the unbreakable bond forged by overcoming this challenging time.